Losing Weight
I really hate dieting.
I've been fat since I was six or so, which means I've been dieting for 23 years. TWENTY-THREE YEARS. I've done Weight Watchers, Atkins, the Chi Diet, The Zone, calorie counting, intuitive eating, HGC, Body for Life, and the list goes on and on and on. The only time I've successfully lost weight was on my LDS mission when I lost more than 70 pounds-20 after hard work in the Missionary Training Center, and the other 50 from walking miles and miles every day and only eating one meal. Let's just say that with my job, that lifestyle isn't sustainable.
Well, four weeks into January, and I am still fat. I've been (mostly) counting calories and steps with MyFitnessPal and my FitBit, drinking all of my water by noon every day, but I haven't miraculously lost 40 pounds already! What gives?! Isn't that how it's supposed to work??
To date, I've lost about five pounds. I haven't started working out. I track my calories maybe three times a week. As I write this, I'm guzzling a 23 fluid ounce Arizona Rx Energy Herbal Tonic that has 300 calories in the can and 75 grams of sugar. Let's just say, I'm not taking this too seriously. So, I'm going to post pictures.
This is me, folks, in all my obese glory. Look at that muffin top. Those flabby arms. That fat neck. Ooo, do you see that sexy head fat wrinkle on the back of my head? Oh yeah, so healthy looking. I definitely don't look like I sweat bacon grease. I'm definitely not sucking in so you don't see the extent of my giant belly. This fatass could run a marathon, right?
Isn't that self-love beautiful? I honestly think these things about my body every day. I start the day looking in the mirror calling out my fat self and filling my thoughts with negativity. That leads me to think, "What's a couple Pop Tarts going to do that I haven't already done to myself?" "You're going to die when you're 45, and no one will be able to carry your casket."
I have to get healthy. I have to stop caring about how I look and start caring about if I can get up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing. How I need to be able to chase my kids and play games. How I need to ensure that I'm doing everything possible to not leave my wife a widow because of my unhealthy lifestyle.
So I'm going to drink my water. I'm going to work out. I'm going to count my calories. I'm going to stop the negative self-talk and love the body that I have. I have to, or I am going to regret it.
I hate dieting, but I think I'll hate dying even more.
I've been fat since I was six or so, which means I've been dieting for 23 years. TWENTY-THREE YEARS. I've done Weight Watchers, Atkins, the Chi Diet, The Zone, calorie counting, intuitive eating, HGC, Body for Life, and the list goes on and on and on. The only time I've successfully lost weight was on my LDS mission when I lost more than 70 pounds-20 after hard work in the Missionary Training Center, and the other 50 from walking miles and miles every day and only eating one meal. Let's just say that with my job, that lifestyle isn't sustainable.
Well, four weeks into January, and I am still fat. I've been (mostly) counting calories and steps with MyFitnessPal and my FitBit, drinking all of my water by noon every day, but I haven't miraculously lost 40 pounds already! What gives?! Isn't that how it's supposed to work??
To date, I've lost about five pounds. I haven't started working out. I track my calories maybe three times a week. As I write this, I'm guzzling a 23 fluid ounce Arizona Rx Energy Herbal Tonic that has 300 calories in the can and 75 grams of sugar. Let's just say, I'm not taking this too seriously. So, I'm going to post pictures.
This is me, folks, in all my obese glory. Look at that muffin top. Those flabby arms. That fat neck. Ooo, do you see that sexy head fat wrinkle on the back of my head? Oh yeah, so healthy looking. I definitely don't look like I sweat bacon grease. I'm definitely not sucking in so you don't see the extent of my giant belly. This fatass could run a marathon, right?Isn't that self-love beautiful? I honestly think these things about my body every day. I start the day looking in the mirror calling out my fat self and filling my thoughts with negativity. That leads me to think, "What's a couple Pop Tarts going to do that I haven't already done to myself?" "You're going to die when you're 45, and no one will be able to carry your casket."
I have to get healthy. I have to stop caring about how I look and start caring about if I can get up a flight of stairs without huffing and puffing. How I need to be able to chase my kids and play games. How I need to ensure that I'm doing everything possible to not leave my wife a widow because of my unhealthy lifestyle.
So I'm going to drink my water. I'm going to work out. I'm going to count my calories. I'm going to stop the negative self-talk and love the body that I have. I have to, or I am going to regret it.
I hate dieting, but I think I'll hate dying even more.
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| Art by Melissa Clark. Model Dom Clark. |
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